Fawlty Towers : Quotes
 

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A B C D E F G H
I J K L M N O P
Q R S T U V W Y

Sybil: You're going to wear that jacket, are you?

Basil: Yes I am, thank you dear, yes.

Sybil: You just haven't a clue, have you?

Basil: You wouldn't understand, dear - it's called 'style'.

From: Series 1 : The Builders


Sybil: Now, have I got everything?

Basil: (quietly) Handbag, knuckle-dusters, flick-knife...

From: Series 1 : The Builders


Major: She's a fine woman, Mrs Fawlty.

Basil: No, no, I wouldn't say that.

Major: No, nor would I.

From: Series 1 : The Wedding Party


Major: Bunch of Krauts, that's what they are, all of 'em. Bad eggs!

Basil: Yes well, forgive and forget, Major... God knows how, the bastards.

From: Series 1 : The Germans


Basil: Oh, (you're) German! I'm sorry, I thought there was something wrong with you.

From: Series 1 : The Germans


German: Will you stop talking about the war!

Basil: Me? You started it!

German: We did not start it.

Basil: Yes you did, you invaded Poland...

From: Series 1 : The Germans


Basil: A satisfied customer. We should have him stuffed.

From: Series 2 : Communication Problems


Sybil: You seem very jolly.

Basil: Jolly?

Sybil: Yes, jolly. Sort of happy.

Basil: Oh, 'happy'. Yes, I remember that.

From: Series 2 : Communication Problems


Sybil: If I find out the money on that horse was yours, you know what I'll do, Basil.

She goes upstairs

Basil: You'll have to sew 'em back on first!

From: Series 2 : Communication Problems


Basil: He gets paid for sticking his nose...

Sybil: Oh, Basil...

Basil: No, I'm going to have my say.. into people's private.. um.. details. Well, just speaking for myself, I don't want a total stranger nosing about in my private parts. Details!

From: Series 2 : The Psychiatrist


Mr H: Could you make me a Waldorf salad.

Basil: Oh... a... Wa...?

Mr H: Waldorf salad.

Basil: I think we're just out of Waldorfs.

From: Series 2 : Waldorf Salad


Basil: Well, of course it's a rat! You have rats in Spain, don't you - or did Franco have them all shot?

From: Series 2 : Basil the Rat)


Basil: Can't we get you on Mastermind, Sybil? Next contestant - Sybil Fawlty from Torquay. Special subject - the bleedin' obvious.

From: Series 2 : Basil the Rat)


Basil: I'll put an ad in the papers. Wanted, kind home for enormous savage rodent. Answers to the name of Sybil.

From: Series 2 : Basil the Rat)

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